HOW TO LOOK CONFIDENT? PART- 2

Hey people! How you doin’! 

Remember we were talking about confidence and it’s importance in the last blog! We even discussed a very relatable example of ourselves. Well if you wish to revise it once, check it out here:- https://heybloggya.blogspot.com/2020/12/how-to-look-confident-part-1.html

Now I would like to share a few tips/ways that I think can help people to look, sound and appear more confident. Tell me in the comments box below if you agree or tried any and if something works, I would be very happy.

*EYE CONTACT?                     

Well, you must have heard about this very common trick of maintaining an “eye contact” so as to look more confident. But no, today I would like to elaborate on how it works and when does it actually work. Imagine you are in a meeting and the person you are talking to is a dirty flirt, but you also want that project from him. To appear confident and compatible, you try to maintain an eye contact with him, he then even gives you the project, but not because of your confidence, but because he THINKS it was a hint you gave him. What was an eye contact for you, was a stare for him. What I really want to say is that sometimes some gestures have double meanings. The same happens with “eye contacts”. So the next time you want to appear confident enough, do not gaze or do not just stick to their face. Make sure you are not looking at them with your eyes wide open and are not making them feel awkward. Make sure you blink your eyes at a normal rate, of course. Do not sit like a robot, move your head, pass some good face gestures. Some gestures maybe like adjusting your specs work at formal places and passing a natural smile on dates or social gatherings, can actually work. Looking down at your legs or even looking very up, is not really a good thing. Maintaining a normal view is always desirable. No matter you’re at formal or an informal place, a warm little smile is good as it makes people think you are comforting and you can be a positive company.

*ATTIRE

What difference can clothes or looks make? Here is the answer- A world of difference. Talking of myself, I always noticed, whenever I wore something of my choice and got ready by myself, I looked more beautiful, had more confidence, did good at things, and gave much better performances. And since then, I have always given importance to how properly and neatly have I dressed up and look on certain occasions. However I know, I need not talk about this as most of us already know “we feel good when we look good”, but I would like to elaborate it a little bit.  Let’s understand it like this: imagine that feeling when you wear your new white sneakers or a new designer or branded dress, aren’t you filled with confidence and doesn’t your outfit thrill you?

Let’s discuss what actually happens. When we wear something we appreciate, we think others too would appreciate it, which boosts up our confidence. That feeling of looking approachable, fills us with happiness, inner happiness finds it’s way to the face which lightens our face up, which then fills us with confidence and self-assurance.

Not only clothes, the accessories too can bring a big change.  Personally speaking, I cannot state in words what confidence a wristwatch provides me with. Sometimes I also enjoy bold dark shades on lips. Well leave it. The only thing YOU need to do just now is, find out what thing works for you, what things makes you feel confident, is it some of your favourite shirt or a favourite pair of shoe, or a wristwatch or what?

My idol once said:- Don’t wear clothes, instead, carry them.

*POSTURE

We rarely notice how we are standing or moving, are we standing upright or are we slouching, are we really walking properly or are walking just for the sake of walking! The irony is however I notice other people’s way of sitting and walking, I myself sometimes forget to behave and maintain a posture. This doesn’t only happens with me, but with all of us. We know how to pin point others, but not ourselves first. We notice a boy slouching and judge and criticise him for that, but we rarely notice what is our posture while judging him: standing both feet apart, belly bulging outwards, fingers scratching scalp! No one likes to see a person without a backbone. There are certain assumptions we all homosapiens make on certain things, like a person who bends too much is assumed to be lazy and of no use, even if he actually is very talented. I do believe in this “first impression is the last impression”. Next time you are at a place where it all matters, pay attention on the way you talk, walk, meet, greet, stand, move. Your body language is actually a language, which says everything about you without even speaking a word. Let them assume by your posture and personality that you are a confident and an audacious person.

*BELEIF

A confident person is all about believing in herself. Having faith in you is the most important thing if you really want others to have faith in you. I have seen a couple of people in my life who are really good actually but have no confidence in themselves and that is why they lack it in front of others too. Before you think of using any of the tricks, you need to trust yourself and your abilities. Don’t compare yourself with anyone else, because it’s hell true that everyone is uniquely different. Having confidence in who you are and what you have is so much enough. One way of doing this, which I would suggest, is making a list of your achievements, to not get pride but faith, faith in yourself. Achievements of any type: social, emotional, physical, academics, skills, psychological, developmental, etc. Sit, calm down and try to jog down all those things you feel happy or proud that you did them. One more way of gathering courage and strengthening yourself is SELF-HELP. Self help by talking to yourself more and more. Believe me, I do this all the time. Self help is the best help. Whenever in self doubt, talk to yourself as one of your well-wishers and be a friend to yourself. Speak positive about yourself to yourself. Admire. For the sake of god, once and for all, be your Poo (from kabhi khushi kabhi gham) No one, not even this blog post can immediately turn you into a confident person, until you would put your individual efforts. For some people with different nature it might be difficult, by different nature I mean, some introverts, some submissive people, some shy ones, or simply those who like to be reserved, but hey! It’s not impossible. By our unstoppable efforts, and by having proper control on our own mind and body, it is possible to oppose our natural nature sometimes, for good. Many people would try to discourage you by talking negative. Yes! Somewhere, someone, somehow will demotivate us, either today or tomorrow. But what makes the difference is how we chose to react? Shall we feel upset and start doubting ourselves? Or shall we motivate ourselves from the demotivation we get, and prove to those who once underestimated us. The decision and the action is always ours.

This is the time. Start taking yourself seriously, if you want others to. Start working for yourself, start motivating yourself, start putting efforts. Start building a character. Once you have a confident personality, the world is yours Pal.

A big man once said-

With realisation of one’s own potential and self confidence in one’s ability, one can build a better world.  

            – Dalai Lama

So that was it. Hope I was able to be of some help and hope you liked the content.

Stay connected. See ya.