Hey everyone! What’s up?
The previous week, one of my dear readers asked me if I could write a blog on how to have a productive self talk, and so here I am with it. Thankyou Alex for giving such a wonderful suggestion.
Well, just a year ago self talk was just as alien to me as it is for many of you right now. But believe me, when I started talking to myself more often, spending more time with myself and stopping to reflect on my thoughts and actions: my life became much more easier and joyful at the same time.
So when I was asked to write a blog on how to have a productive self talk, I immediately went back to myself and ironically, I had to go into my productive self talk to figure out what makes my self talks work for me. And so, I’ll be sharing the answers that I got, in this hope that what works for me shall work for you too.
Before that, just one vital small thing. To me, self talk is the thing which rejuvenates me. So if anyone who wants to know what I mean by a“productive self-talk” here, the answer is “One which restores: happiness, positivity even in dark, joy, motivation and hope.”
Here are the small steps you can take to change your life through a productive self talk and be more lively, zestful, productive, positive and much much more of a healthy person:-
STEP 1: The Best Ambience.
In order to have a healthy self talk, it’s very necessary to choose place which is full of vitality. As a nature lover and talking practical too, I feel that the most of the vitality can be felt when we are surrounded by our origin, the place which we are born from and are a part of- the mother earth. Observe people doing their daily chores, watch children playing, start feeling the cool breeze, go into a deep meditation where you first listen to the sweet chirruping of the birds and slowly, when you are able to find your lost connection with your true mother, you will start feeling your heart beats. I would suggest every being reading this to try it for once and for all at least. However, if you think this is not what you would like to do (maybe because you think you’re an unstoppable achiever or a busy businessman), then an empty and peacefully quiet room with lots of positive vibrations will also do. Make sure you feel most of the positivity around you, because what is going to come next depends largely on this.
STEP 2: Mirror to yourself.
I know it’s not easy to accept things and your mistakes, I know it’s not easy to digest the truth, I know it’s not easy to face your realities and fears, however what I also know for sure is- the only person who will never judge you is YOU. I agree that today, no one can be trusted blindly with this that they would understand you without making some or the other judgements. But the only person who understands you and does that for the rest of his life and will never let you down, is you yourself. So I ask why to fake it to yourself? See, when we are in a self talk, we need to make sure that we are not lying to our own selves. There is no point of lying to yourself; you would only feel more messed up. You see, many a times we don’t say what we actually want to say to others, sometimes it’s known as faking yourself up and sometimes it can be good because it’s then known as controlling yourself from saying something mean or rude. But neither of these things can happen when you are in a self talk because being honest to yourself has no consequences. Start being true to yourself. People who value self talks enjoy the greatest pleasure i.e. truthfulness. To enjoy the pleasure truthfulness brings, it’s important for an individual to be aware of himself. Don’t feel hesitant of confessing to yourself, you can always rely on one forever friend- YOU. Be honest to yourself because if you won’t, you won’t be able to get best out of the self talk. So do these things honestly in your self talk- accept the reality, speak the truth, talk practical, confess to yourself, trust yourself with your secrets, apologise to yourself for your wrong actions and the sh*t you gave to the beautiful garden of your mind, don’t forget to forgive yourself too with a serious promise made to yourself of not repeating it again, try to think from that different perspective I always talk about: is it always they, honestly figure out your flaws and decide to work on them.
STEP 3: THINK ABOUT SOLUTIONS!
I am so sorry to hurt the feelings of those people who expected that I would say self talk is all about weeping, sobbing and comforting yourself while doing it and being easy on yourself. Nope, that’s not a productive self talk. It will obviously make you feel better, but won’t allow you to feel good. If you really want to get out of a mess through a good self talk, you must think about and talk about solutions.
Repeatedly saying that “I am a mess” will not change things. Which will change things is the idea or the solution that you would come up with. In such self talks, where you are trying to find an answer, make sure you are only thinking about the answer. Sobbing or even over thinking about the problems will do no good, but will just make things even worse. Strengthen yourself up and try thinking of the practical solutions to your problems.
STEP 4: FOLLOW RIGHTEOUSNESS
Now, when you would be already having a good self talk, done in a great atmosphere, done honestly, and done while thinking of solutions, you will start feeling good about your own self. But we need not stop there. They were just words, right words we spoke to ourselves, but the right actions are still to be accomplished which will complete the process of a productive self talk. The last step of following righteousness means, there are a lot of wrongs which will seem to be rights to you because reasonably, in a self talk you are the listener, speaker, adviser- and that can make things really difficult. You will think you are right when actually you won’t be. But universe doesn’t forget to show us the right path, it’s just that we humans neglect it or maybe we never see it. Through our self talks, at the end, we should be able to see the right path of righteousness. Maybe sometimes you will not like that path or maybe you would repel it, but remember right things are always distasteful and so are repelled by all of us. And so, control yourself and your mind and heart, be the master of your soul and work towards the path of righteousness.
At the end, stand up, smile and enter your monotonous life again, but this time with a desire to bring a positive change in yourself and execute the solutions you thought of in your self talk.
So that was it. Hope I was able to be of some help and hope you liked the content.
Have a wonderful day ahead!
See you next week.
